Do you know those moments when you hear a song, see a landscape, have a good conversation, where your heart feels as if it could not possibly be any fuller? Those moments that heaven and earth collide and you laugh in the middle of a store, cry at the most inopportune moment, and dance and hope that no one's watching? I find myself living for those moments, they are the things that bring me that unquenchable passion that no one would squelch. It's times like that where I feel as if God is actually holding my hand and laughing with me. It's those times that I catch a glimpse of what it means, in scripture, where it talks about Him delighting over me. And then reality hits through a ridiculous driver, an unexpected bill, a day where you feel like if you disappeared no one would notice. And then I'm reminded that when my world comes crashing down around me I have a choice, to be burdened or be free. It's never an easy choice, one that I will wrestle with for the rest of my life, but it's a choice nonetheless.
I have been living between these two worlds for the past two months, learning to find peace and solitude in the most loud, obscene, and dirty places. As you know, I packed up and headed to San Francisco, in June, to embark in a five week EMT (Emergency Medical Technician) school. It was five of the most incredibly challenging and amazing weeks of my life. I made it through many painfully long nights of studying, many long days of classroom time learning skills, human processes, ridiculously long words, how quickly I could bond with a group of random people, and saw how extremely fragile the human body is and how God truly holds our next breath in the palm of His hand.
Living in San Francisco itself was also incredibly different than anything I've ever experienced. I have only ever visited for short periods of time, so to call it home was a completely different feeling. I adapted quickly to walking everywhere, carrying pepper spray in my pocket, and finding the creativity of God in the diversity of His creation. Honestly, I loved it, it was hard to say goodbye.
There are a hundred different stories I could share about the school itself, but to spare my fingers and your brain I will only highlight a few. The first being that through my time on the streets of a big city, I began to realize that I have put God in yet another box. He has been showing me that missions is so different than the four walls I have placed it in. Missions conjures up visions of distant lands, naked people, and poorly dressed missionaries for more than just me I am sure. But what if missions was merely us bringing the kingdom to those around us no matter where we are? I don't need the fancy title of missionary to do that. I know, it sounds so basic, but God has been really rocking my world with this one lately, all because I took off my YWAM hat and traded it in for a navy blue uniform and stethoscope for five weeks.
As you can imagine, emergency medicine is a very personal field that brings you into peoples' homes when they didn't clean beforehand, it exposes skeletons in people's closets, you being the first spectator to their secrets, and it brings an extreme vulnerability, letting us see and hear things they would be mortified for anyone else to know. And when you can bring the peace and love of Christ with you as you walk in their door, really amazing things can happen.
During my school I had the chance to do shifts in both the hospital and on a fire truck and have continued to do more ride alongs since. Every time I am struck by how God can use me, a rather loud, opinionated, and paranoid girl, to bring His peace to those that are in some of their most fearful and painful moments. All I know is that it has nothing to do with me, it's all Him.
I suppose I should also tell you that I did complete the course, graduating as joint valedictorian (don't ask me how that happened, God totally deserves credit for that one), and am both a nationally and California state certified EMT. I even have an ambulance driver's license (yeah I know, scary).
So what does this all mean for me now? I am back in Pismo Beach with YWAM, still working with Project Sixty-One and RecueNet, also doing base related work. I am also working on getting a weekly volunteer opportunity set up with local ambulance company. This way I can keep my skills fresh and also be able to build relationships with people in the community. What does this mean for me in the future? Well, God is stirring some things in my heart that I am still praying about, more to come on that in the near future.
On another note, next month I will be spending about three weeks in Salem, Oregon with the RescueNet team. We will be heading up another disaster relief training course for those that are interested in joining the team. This will also serve as my completion of Phase II of my training, leaving me ready to serve on deployments starting in November. I have been asked to teach the medical portion of the course which will be about two days worth of teaching. I am really excited about this but nervous as this will be one of the longest teaching times I have ever been a part of. Also this will be my first time teaching on medical topics, so I would really appreciate your prayers while I am preparing. I will keep you updated on my progress as the course approaches and let you know more specifically how you can be praying for me during my actual teaching time.
Finally I wanted to thank those of you that helped send me to this EMT school, it was extremely valuable and life changing and I appreciate your investment in me. Also thanks to those of you that helped cover my hospital bill, it was covered in full and paid on time because of your promptness and willingness to give!
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